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snorlaxatives:

why the fuck does everyone in the purge movies want to kill people if crime was legal i’d find a way to erase my student debt and also probably steal a bunch of new clothes

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When I’m lying in my bed I think about life and I think about death and neither one particularly appeals to me.

Morrissey (via durianseeds)
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mrtwentington:

skepticalavenger:

whats-an-algebra:

do atheists say oh my god

yep.  we say it any time we hear something that’s unbelievable.

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  • demon:i possessed you
  • me:get the fuck out
  • demon:damn...aight...rude ass bitch...i just need a place to stay my girl kicked me out and i aint got no money...
  • me:shit man, you can stay but don't be spinning my head like an owl and shit
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